What They Wish You Knew: 7 Insights from Someone with OCD

Supporting a loved one with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) can be challenging, but with the right approach, you can help without reinforcing their compulsions. The key is to guide, not enable. Here’s how you can provide meaningful support while respecting their journey toward recovery.

Educate Yourself on OCD

OCD is more than just being “neat” or “organized.” It’s a disorder marked by intrusive thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors (compulsions) that temporarily relieve anxiety. Understanding this distinction is crucial in offering the right support.

Learn About Triggers Every individual with OCD has unique triggers. These can vary widely, so taking the time to learn what specifically affects your loved one will make your support more effective. Awareness helps you respond with empathy rather than frustration.

Communicate Openly and Gently

A supportive conversation can make all the difference. Here’s how to ensure your approach is helpful:

Ask open-ended questions Encourage them to share their experiences when they feel comfortable. This shows that you’re interested in understanding rather than making assumptions.

Avoid judgment OCD behaviors might seem irrational from the outside, but they often provide temporary relief from overwhelming anxiety. Listen without dismissing or minimizing their struggles.

Set boundaries when needed  While supporting your loved one, be sure to communicate your own limits kindly. Balancing care for them and yourself is essential for a healthy relationship.

Avoid Enabling Compulsions

While it may be tempting to help with their compulsions to ease their distress, doing so can reinforce OCD behaviors. Instead, take a compassionate but firm approach:

Don’t participate in compulsions. Gently redirect them toward healthier coping mechanisms rather than reinforcing rituals.

Empathize without enabling. Acknowledge their anxiety without feeding into the compulsions. Let them know you understand their discomfort and support their efforts to tolerate uncertainty.

Support Their Recovery Journey

Encouraging professional help and celebrating progress can make a huge impact on their path to healing:

Encourage professional treatment Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy is the gold standard for OCD treatment. If they’re hesitant, remind them that seeking help is a sign of strength.

Celebrate small victories Overcoming OCD is incredibly challenging, and every step forward—no matter how small—deserves recognition.

Be patient with setbacks Recovery isn’t linear. There will be ups and downs, but understanding this helps create a non-judgmental and supportive environment.

Prioritize Self-Care

Supporting someone with OCD can be emotionally demanding, so taking care of yourself is just as important:

Take care of your own well-being. You can’t pour from an empty cup—make sure you’re managing your stress, too.

Seek support if needed. Connecting with caregiver support groups or resources can provide guidance and reassurance as you navigate your role.

Be Compassionate and Patient

OCD is difficult for both the person experiencing it and those who love them. Offering compassion and patience—both to your loved one and to yourself—can strengthen your relationship and create a foundation of trust and understanding. OCD does not define your loved one, and with adaptability, education, and empathy, your relationship can thrive. By setting healthy boundaries, encouraging professional help, and fostering open communication, you can make a meaningful difference in their journey.

Want to Learn More?

If you’re looking for deeper insights into supporting a loved one with OCD or other mental health challenges, don’t miss out on Caregiver University—a resourceful space guided by Dr. Fite. Here, you’ll find expert advice, tools, and community support to help you navigate your journey as a caregiver.